"I had had no idea what a flesh-eating disease was before my injury." Brandy began to explain.

She went on to tell her story: “It was May 2008 and I was working in Fort McMurray when I got sick. One day when I was climbing out of the machinery I pulled a muscle under my left arm. Working in the oilfield they take work place injuries very serious so I was taken to the onsite infirmary where they suggested I go to the hospital, from the time I hurt myself to the time I got to the nurse I couldn’t even move my arm an inch. At the hospital the doctor didn’t even look up from his clipboard and wrote out a few prescriptions and gave me light duties for two weeks. I thought nothing really of it the amount of WCB claims that go through that place are ridiculous. Going back to work the next day I felt like I was getting a cold my buddy that I car pool with was sick so I just figured I was getting whatever he had. Being on light duties I was put into some guy’s office and read about all the different machines we ran and wrote all the quizzes to go with them so I could then run everything they had. Throughout that first day I struggled staying awake and was having hot cold flashes. I was so thankful when the day was over and to start the 1.5 hour drive home.

The next day was the same thing it was awful and I felt worse than before, I asked to go home. When I got home I felt really sick my mom decided I needed to go back to the hospital, we thought maybe I was having a reaction to the pills he gave me. When there again they said the pills wouldn’t have that effect on me and sent me on my way. The next day I called into work I was so sick I could hardly move and the pain under my arm was unbearable. At this point it was birthday and days off started all my friends wanted me to come out but I was in no shape to do anything. My best friend Amy stopped by to give me a cake and a present. She was so sweet. When she was at the door I was on the couch grasping anything I could grad to get there to let her in, I made it far enough I could see the door was unlocked so I was able to tell her it was open, thank god she heard me cause I then collapsed and she carried me back to the couch. I felt so weak and not in control of my body at all. I wasn’t able to eat for days, I was just sucking on ice cubes and when my belly would get full I would puke it up. During these days I just got weaker and would cry because of the pain and frustration of losing the ability to move and do things for myself. May 28th I went back to the hospital because I thought I was dying. This time they took an x-ray and sent me on my way and still didn’t do anything for me.

May 29^th when my mom got home from work I could hardly stay conscience. She ended up on the phone with my sister in Calgary to see what she thought, I remember because I was so weak I had lost my voice but I was laying there trying to tell her to call an ambulance. I didn’t hear what she did but when I came to again there were paramedics there trying to ask me questions but I wasn’t staying conscious. I thought I was dying for sure and this was it for me I didn’t know what was wrong with me and I just felt like that was it. The next time I came to I was in the ambulance and they were discussing how to get my shirt off without moving my arm, this always makes me laugh but I looked up at him cause I could only see one and I asked “Do you need my shirt off?” he replied “yes, we need to get it off you” so I told them as clear as day “Just cut it off” he came back with “but you might want to have it back” and me again the most coherent as I could “it says fucking cheerio’s, cut it off” and that was it for me again until they were wheeling me into the hospital and there was a nurse running beside me and she asked me “Were you here yesterday getting x-rays?” I said yes to her but it was at that point everything shut down for me and I was sure I was gone.

The Fort McMurray hospital didn’t know what was wrong with me they thought I had Pneumonia. With how they were treating me it was just keeping me alive. When I was just getting worse they decided to fly me to the University Hospital in Edmonton, once there the receiving doctor saw my condition and immediately knew I had Necrotizing Fasciitis and rushed me to surgery to start the first of many debridement surgeries. I was kept in a drug induced coma for three weeks, when I woke I didn’t know what was wrong with me and I couldn’t move. At this time my mom and sister never left my side and other family came to see to be with me. There were times the Doctors would tell them I wasn’t going to make it through the night. There were times the fever got bad so bad my heart beat would speed up to fast and I stopped breathing they had to revive me at least three times that I am aware of. Once I was awake I had to rebuild all my muscles and relearn how to walk, it was extremely difficult to have to count on the nurses and family to do things for me. I stayed in the hospital for an additional three weeks while there going through a total of 18 surgeries including the beginning of the reconstructive process.

Once I was discharged my mom rented a house in Edmonton so we were close to the hospital and doctors, I had to go to the hospital every other day for physio and make sure the infection wasn’t coming back. The next year was incredibly hard I felt like a monster, the disease ate a hole under my left arm 11 cm by 6 cm, it ate all the tissue under my left breast but the doctors were able to save the skin of it, I was also left with a hole in the centre of my chest 18 cm by 6 cm. They had used two skin grafts to cover the holes that were left. Over the next two years the doctor I had did not want me to work, he didn’t want me under any extra stress and just concentrate on rebuilding my physical body.

So after a few months I could take care of myself again so I decided to move back to Calgary. Once here it was a struggle trying to cope with everything and accept what had happened. I felt like a monster and being single didn’t expect anyone to want me again. I ended up getting back together with the guy I was with before I went to Ft Mac. We were together for 3.5 years prior and never lost a connection so I figured why not...

It was harder then I imagined trying to be intimate with him, when it did happen the lights had to be off and I didn’t enjoy being touched at all. Brian tried so hard to make feel good about myself but the harder he tried the worse I felt. It lasted just over a year before we gave up and went our separate ways.

Over the years I stayed single and not meeting anyone new for fear of being rejected because of the scars I had. I was traveling to Edmonton often to see my doctor there and have had a total of 7 reconstructive surgeries. I am now comfortable enough with myself that I have met a new man but the insecurities I still carry with me are huge. When I look down all I see are the giant scars that were there and the feeling of only being half a woman.

I have good days and bad, the good I don’t care if a bit of the scar is showing because the cut of my shirt is a too low to hide everything, the bad days I make sure I wear clothes that cover everything and still feel like people are staring me. I struggle with celebrating my birthday because it’s also the anniversary date to when everything happened, it’s a very hard time of year me but I try to look at the brighter side and say to myself “At least I’m still here.”

ABB Project Photographer Lindsay reflected on this shoot:

"When Brandy told me her story it was difficult to fight back the tears, it put into perspective all the things I struggle with on a daily basis with my own body issues. This beautiful woman has literally been to hell and back. The most striking thing to me was her choice of tattoo on her back that is still a work in progress such as she. A Phoenix, rising from ashes reborn for another chance at life just as she did. Mandy’s willingness to be so at ease with me and bare her scars and soul was deeply moving. Incredible. She wants people to know there is life beyond the scars, they do not define you. She has since emailed me and thanked me for the experience. It has been a great coping mechanism. Mandy, I think you’re on a whole other level of beautiful. You are an inspiration to me."

- Lindsay is an A Beautiful Body Project Photographer based in Calgary, Canada. You can learn more about her and book a shoot here: www.facebook.com/infinitelightphotography